"I have to have how many of these a day for how long?"
And so it begins, from today until surgery the Optifast plan is underway.
As much as it seems like this was sent to punish me for that one time I missed a really easy Bon Jovi lyrics question in a pub quiz, the next weeks on Optifast is for a real reason.
Other than kick starting my weight loss in a less than enjoyable way, and to improve my recovery after surgery the main purpose of it is to actually help reduce the size of my liver.
Turns out, even my organs are getting fat shamed in today’s society. Uncool man, uncool!
In order for my surgeon to get to my stomach he needs to go past the liver so the smaller it can be before surgery the better.
To be told that prior to my surgery they would like for me to lose at least 7kgs (or just over 15 pounds for my American friends). That was something that massively stressed me out when I first heard that. I mean part of the reason why I am having the surgery is because of the sheer nightmare I constantly have in trying to lose any weight…enter a Very Low Calorie Diet, or Optifast.
This stuff, if you follow the plan properly and don’t ‘reward’ yourself with cheat foods that aren’t part of the program, is supposed to provide you with a nutritionally complete diet that limits carbs to push your body into ketosis. That’s the process where your body uses it’s own fat stores to fuel your body. All of this in turn helps the size of your liver reduce.
This is only 18 days of the next 28 days worth of breakfast, lunch and dinner.
Be sad people that you are all wasting your lives eating real food that requires chewing, or savouring the delights of a well planned grazing platter or feasting on the well roasted side of beef while I am going to be enjoying this little ditty of a meal plan-
BREAKFAST- An invigorating morning pick me up so I can join the ranks of people saying “Don’t talk to me until I’ve had my coffee” with a Mocha favoured Optifast shake.
LUNCH- Either a cheeky, full bodied, slightly oaky Optifast with hints of Caramel or a light, refreshing fruity Strawberry Optifast.
DINNER- This is where we get crazy kids. I get to have 2….I repeat 2 cups of certain vegetables. I know you’re all super jealous of me right now. If that wasn’t enough I get a saucy little desert of a Chocolate Optifast shake.
I’m living the dream people, living the dream.
If that wasn’t enough, if I’m a good girl and go to the gym to workout I can go nuts I can have a crazy amount of fruit. Like a 1/4 cup of blueberries, or 5-10 strawberries. Honestly, I don’t know how I’ll be able to get it all down it’s just sooooooo much.
Between all of this and my 2 litres of calorie-free liquids it’s gonna be party party party for me.
Anything for fewer potential complications during surgery right??…..Hold me people, this is gonna be tough.
